T H E T U S C A R O R A R E V I E W 2 0 2 2 1 1 now numb hand to her purse, this time enlisting her second hand to open the bottle’s lid. Before she could regain composure, she was up next in line. Dropping the retrieved pill back into her purse, she felt the self-doubt pile in her brain. Her items were rung up one by one, confirmed by a beep with each scan. “Your total is $55.67.” The cashier said. Mona fumbled through her purse for her wallet. As she pulled it from her bag, the wallet slipped from her grasp and fell with a thud onto the floor. Bending down to get it, Mona felt the weight of tears in her eyes. Inhale for five. Exhale for five. Repeat until panic fades. Except now Mona’s counts of five quickened, her breath began to hitch as the tingling sensation spread through her legs. Turning back to the clerk, she jiggled her bank card out of the wallet, avoiding eye contact and furrowing her brow so that no tears could escape. The pubescent boy completed the transaction, seeming to take no notice of her shaking hands and deteriorating composure. She could feel the man behind her staring. “Thank you for shopping with us ma’am.” The boy recited. “You too,” Mona replied. “I-I mean, um, thank you.” Mona always said the wrong thing. Frantically grabbing the loaded bags, tears began to flow. She situated the groceries into one arm and quickly pivoted towards the exit. Mona’s free hand sifted wildly through her purse as she exited the automatic sliding doors. As she extracted the plastic bottle, the lid released itself and an explosion of pills littered the parking lot like confetti. Mona’s tears now turned to heavy sobs as she helplessly watched all but one roll downward into a murky puddle of rainwater. Mona looked at the last remaining pill, and hiked her bags up on her hip. What a catastrophe, just for a simple grocery trip.
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